When in L.A., visit Polyester, and explore the eccentric side of downtown! This wonderful and unexpected gem of a bookstore, totally excites me: Books on vintage erotica, unusual fetishes, sexploitation, erotic subculture and a gallery that specializes in vintage and contemporary photography. When I first wandered into this store, I didn’t want to leave because I couldn’t put down this book on Sex Machines by Timothy Archibald. Mondo bizarre!

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Something new for couples from that delightful shop, Coco de Mer that appeals to both your erotic and political voice, the Bondage for Freedom kit. A personal favorite of mine, the kit contains wrist ties made from 100% silk in black and a 100% silk black blindfold which is embroidered in orange, with the words, “The only real freedom is freedom from fear”.

Bondage for Freedom is the newly created non-profit section of Coco de Mer. All the profits from the sale of this product is donated to charity.

But what good is being blind folded without the release of some endorphins right? Try the “Ostrich Feather and Black Whip” also by Coco de Mer. Build up the intensity with this sexy riding crop and use the feather to build anticipation, swishing it between the legs. It feels fantastic!

Spanking not included.

Sometimes a porno comes along that raises my eyebrow…the sequel to Pirates, a CGI XXXtravaganza with campy storylines and some og adult’s best talent is one SUPER-anticipated releases. But here’s one for those who just can’t get enough Indie or who have explorer fantasies of their own: Carolina Jones and the Broken Covenant. Yessir, this vid gives a new spin to the term action/adventure. Grab your man, snuggle under the covers and (ouch, I had to) watch out for the trouser snake!Also recommended: Chemistry 

For beginners: How to Watch Porn 

This wonderful retail shop, Coco de Mer, with an outpost in London and another in Los Angeles, blows my mind: vintage erotica, luxurious sensuality, and the most covetable lingerie and products (a jade cock ring? and those fab costumes in this video). If I were a retail store, I’d be this one. Ladies, get ready to explore and blossom.

In the tradition of  surveys (not just the one’s in Cosmopolitan magazine), New York Times best selling author Suzy Spencer is pulling a bit of a Kinsey, but giving it her own sensational treatment. Want to be a part of a survey of sex in America? There aren’t many good, thorough ones out there. I believe it has a lot to do with who answers the questions. Help paint a broad, informed picture.

By the way, Erotica LA is coming up this weekend, so all you in SoCal, make trip to this shopping and education experience non-pareil. I’m really keen in checking out the burlesque workshop:

“Join Kitty Cadillac and Heather West from Cat Moves School of Exotic Arts for this interactive workshop. Develop costume ideas, utilize props and learn sensual movement to create an evening of exotic entertainment. Dive deeper into the art and mystery of strip tease and the lap dance.”

and the erotic role play for couple with the amazing Midori:

“Discover how different forms of Sex Bondage can enhance your relationship. Our sex-positive educator will help you navigate through this intriguing and taboo topic. You�ll learn Hands on Rope Bondage and various techniques to turn up the heat and take trust and intimacy to the next level.”

Immodesty Blaize certainly knows a thing or two about seduction and tease. The burlesque performer is up there with Dita von Teese on her side of the pond, guesting on popular TV shows like “Faking It” and “Britain’s Next Top Model.” She’s also teamed up with lingerie label Madame V to create the Showtime Collection.  I found this interview on Knickers, a lingerie blog, and thought that the performer had a few good explanations about the appeal of burlesque in our day. I mean, who can resist the aesthetics and ideals of something that oft gets described with words like “coquette,” “tease” and “opulence”?

From the Knickers interview:

You create your own performances, and work with a great deal of women to bring burlesque to the stage and screen – is this “new” burlesque an example of women reclaiming their own sexuality?

Not really, I think women have been reclaiming their sexuality for quite some time before the burlesque revival! I think my performances have an undeniable erotic content, but they are also pieces of very elaborate theatre, and they are conceived with as much detail of theme, costume, prop, music and set, as one would a theatricalpresentation. So for me there’s a lot involved. I think in this way, women are attracted to the glamour and opulence as well as the erotic content. I think they like the humour too, it’s cheeky, it’s teasing, it’s clever. I wonder if somehow it feels accessible to more women therefore, than with other forms of erotic entertainment.

For the uninitiated, can you describe burlesque for our readers, and tell us about how you came to be a burlesque performer?

Burlesque means literally ‘to parody’. Simply put, it is a form of ironic cabaret, which is to say it is very tongue in cheek. It is also
a genre known for having a strong erotic undertow. It started in London in the 1860s, but it was the Minsky Brothers in ‘30s New York who truly put the glamorous striptease in burlesque, which gave rise to legends such as Gypsy Rose Lee, Lili St.Cyr, and Dixie Evans who is still going strong today.

For me, becoming a burlesque showgirl was a natural progression. As well as being reared on old Busby Berkley musicals and camp old Hollywood classics, as a teenager I became a huge fan of pin-up queen Betty Page and through her I discovered the legendary burlesque star Tempest Storm. I, myself had blossomed into a classic hourglass shape which I have to say was not popular at the time – it was all super-waifs and heroin chic…so images of women like Tempest Storm with their beautiful powerful womanliness really spoke to me and I knew I wanted to make the most of my curves in the same way!

We love the burlesque style because it looks amazing on women of so many sizes – do you think part of burlesque’s popularity is because of this celebration of a woman’s curves?

Partly, yes, although I’d say there’s no right or wrong body shape for burlesque. Certainly the classic old bombshell look of Mae West and Marilyn Monroe was full of curves, and then the legendary performer Lili St.Cyr was tall and lithe with legs up to her armpits! So I think really it promotes the idea of character and individuality. It encourages women to find their own alter-ego! In addition, I think we are at a point where people are getting bored of grungy reality shows, and they want live entertainment; theatre, fantasy, and proper old music again. I also think women and men alike are loving the chance to take time to dress up. Certainly I’ve noticed more women enhancing their silhouettes by wearing foundation-wear again, so suspender belts, girdles, basques, retro-shaped bullet bras are around…great!

What essentials would you recommend for a woman who wants to try out the burlesque look herself?

I don’t think there is one ‘burlesque look’, since burlesque is a form of entertainment rather than a fashion style. It spans 150 years,
so it has lived through fashions as diverse as the corseted Victorian, the fringed flapper, and the 50s pinup. However I would always
recommend that the ladies experience the joys of a good pair of nipple tassels!

Ever dreamed of having everything you have ever dreamed of at your fingertips and more? Well, every sexy thing you’ve ever dreamed of? Erotica LA is sort of a wonderland of adult fun - everything you could need, want, or never want to touch for seduction will be presented to you. Granted, if you’re not a Cali girl, the trek might be too long to join in on the erotic workshops and other fun, but check out the site any way. Hey, you could even sneak in to Dave Navarro’s birthday party at Sexopolis’ After Party on June 7. Get your hedonism on!

Have you ever walked into an adult video store? Ack, I barely had until recently when I got a new freelance gig reviewing the stuff. Only once before, in high school, had I visited a video store with a naughty back room with my boyfriend. (His idea.) The place was way out of our town in a semi-industrial area and everything about the experience felt un-femme-friendly. I browsed the new Hollywood releases, and he retrieved… something. We watched it together, a very stimulating experience, but the video itself was not my cup of tea, really. The thrill came from the clandestine, taboo feeling. Some previews piqued my interest, but how would I go about finding a video for myself?

OK, I was just 18 at the time, young and impressionable, but I wonder if my first porno experience had been girl-friendly, would I have sought it out myself at another point?

Now I’ve become sort of an expert on the stuff and this is how a lady, a dirty girl, any female can get her video jollies. When you’ve found what you like, here’s how to watch it.

1. Visit a store with women in mind. Babeland, Good Vibrations, Smitten Kitten (MN), Pleasures of the Heart (CA), for example, are store for females, totally fun to visit and they have a very knowledgeable staff who can help you with any question you can drag out of your pleasure chest (Oo, the Pleasure Chest is another good retailer).

2. Finding a video. I tell you, all box covers seem to look the same, especially when you look at them for a while. How do you find the good stuff in a sea of hard, hardcore? Here are a few tips on how to avoid the roughest of the rough and the plain boring:

-Girlfriends Films makes all-girl movies for women. Very sensual.

- Zentropa makes arty films by women for women. Scandinavian quality stuff. Check out English Language All About Anna.

-Certain performers don’t really seem to love what they are doing. Sasha Grey, Bree Olson and Katsumi (now Katsuni) love what they do, though they do get rough. Find titles with them.

-Scour the classics. Porn back in the day was way more sensual and erotic than what is made today. I totally recommend going retro. Vanessa Del Rio is a good performer to catch and movies like Deep Throat, Caligula (mainstream movie with real sex), The Opening of Misty Beethoven and Devil in Miss Jones are particularly good.

- Go new. If you like a retro or arty vibe, check out the releases from Vivid Alt. It’s new stuff from the art school grads - fun and with flair. Also, fine art photographer Carlos Batts’ movies Voluptuous Life and Young Hollywood give you a whole lot more than sex. The first is a documentary exploring sexuality and body image, the second is an erotic take on his young Hollywood fine art photo book.

3. Go to the source. AVN.com is the industry source for adult videos. Peruse their reviews and inform yourself… I’d stick to editor’s choices. They’re the best.

What: Scandinavian rom com for grown-ups. Seriously. It includes real sex!

Why:Us girls need some peeps in our corner when it comes to the movies that make bedtime with boyfriend a little spicier!

“It’s a Danish film shot entirely in English and features both adult and mainstream stars performing sex on camera for the first time. And it’s all performed within the context of a very female-empowering story.” (PR person Daniel Metcalf told AVN.com)

Plot: “Anna is a modern, independent single girl, focused on her job and wary of getting caught in romantic relationships. Her life is all about fun. Strangers without strings. No commitment, no casualties. She has just found a new apartment, and is tempted to let her latest boyfriend, Frank, move in with her. Instead, she finds a tenant: The flamboyant, fun-loving Camilla, who shares Anna’s views on love and commitment. But then an old boyfriend happens to knock on her door: Johan, the very man who five years previously broke Anna’s heart. Anna is tempted. It’s not good. More than ever, she needs to get back on the merry-go-round and move on. Fortunately, she receives an offer to design costumes for a theatre in Paris. As far away from romantic temptation as possible — right?” Written by Nicolas Barbano

Who: Co-produced by Zentropa Films, the company behind Lars Von Trier’s Dancer in the Dark (the tragic musical with Bjork) and Innocent Pictures, All About Anna is made by women for women. Feminist French adult star Ovidie is featured, as is a Danish pop star Gry Bay (above). Totally Couples Friendly!