Aren’t you glad this aren’t didn’t start out “5 ways to put the ‘ho’ in hohoho”? I was tempted… as it’s that time of year where the puns sound punnier, the sweaters more elaborate, and normally cheesy sentiments fill everyone with good cheer. So let’s take all that happy holidays and the spirit of giving and put it into the bedroom, shall we? There’s no reason eggnog should be the only thing full of spice!

1.’Tis the season for a quickie!

Between family obligations and Secret Santa sneakiness, sex may be the last thing on your naughty or your nice list. On the nice side, bust out your organizer and pencil in some alone time with your man. For the busiest of the busy, the bedroom may be out of the question. Get naughty by stealing cheeky kisses, squeezes, and more while wrapping presents, just before the folks turn up for dinner, well, whenever the fancy strikes! Read the rest.

Reality shows like “so you think you can dance” is making dancing sexy again! Not since Ricky Martin was living la vida loca, was dance so popular. Can you believe that was a decade ago already? Yikes! Dancing as a language between a couple can be very sensual. Whether you’re on a first date or married, taking a dance class together can be fun and hot!If you’re on a date, dancing allows to break the ice, get a little closer without the proverbial pressure and discover each others rhythmic chemistry. If you’re married, you get to spice things up with style and work on some moves together so when you go to that next family party, you can take over the dance floor!

Try taking a dance lesson from one of the following three dance styles.

Salsa, Tango, Swing.

Also, try Belly dancing!

With the economy as such where spending money on a big trip isn’t exactly realistic, it’s time to get creative and reinvent the weekend getaway. Just because you can’t fly to Paris doesn’t mean you can’t be romantic and take a drive to that little French town two hours from the city and make a weekend of it, strolling through Main st.? Go on a a weekend getaway with your love, preferably somewhere neither of you have ever been, whether it’s a cabin, a new city or some beach town, pack up some unmentionables (don’t forget candles!) and take a drive to a nearby destination and play tourist. It will make you feel like newlyweds! Once My boyfriend and I missed a flight and had to wait the entire day for the next plane out. We made the most of our day by visiting tourist sights we never really get to enjoy, getting pampered at the spa, trying new restaurants according to the theme of the weekend, and we ended up having one of the best times ever!

So, there an trend in the adult world: horror porn. I love it. As a lifelong fan of the gothic, slasher films, and, well, also a connoiseur of the erotic, this seems a happy, vampy match. Coming on up to Halloween, you may want to consider unleashing your inner vamp and exploring the social anxieties that got the Victorians all faint and flustered. Get out your best role-playing abilities and put those sexy costumes to good use with a night in at your manor!

Cosmo ran a fab article about that not-so-nice act of kissing. Here are a few ways to rock his world by taking it back to basics (yes, that was a Christina Aguilera shout out! Even she went back from dirrrty…). Shelly Hess, author of the book “Power Pucker: Great Kissers Make Great Lovers” had these tips and techniques on kissing to offer:

The Hot Hello

The quick “Hi, honey” peck is no way to rebond with your babe, whether you’ve been missing him since your morning bagel or last Saturday night. Set the tone for your time together with a kiss that makes him think, Oh you are happy to see me. “Greet your guy with enthusiasm and he’ll immediately feel loved and appreciated,” explains Linda Olson, PhD, host of the syndicated radio show America’s Love Doctor. “A high-energy hello smooch is the ultimate way to communicate that excitement and foreshadow the fun to come.” Plus, when he kisses you back with the same degree of desire, you’ll feel that love rush too.

The hot hello actually starts long before your lips meet. Let’s set the scene: You see your guy. Maybe he’s working his way across the bar, maybe he’s standing on your doorstep. You lock eyes, flash him a smile, and slowly begin your approach, maintaining eye contact the whole way. When he’s in close range, utter a husky “Hey there, gorgeous” and press your body up against his. This is key for creating intimacy: You don’t want to strike the disastrous A-frame pose (think lips together, hips miles apart), according to William Cane, kissing coach and author of The Art of Kissing.

Okay, bodies meshed? Roger that. Now it’s time to pucker up, baby. Wrap your hand around the nape of his neck and pull his face gently toward you. When your mouths finally meet, maintain a strong but closed-lip seal for up to 10 sultry seconds.

Tip: Keep your tongue reined in; this kiss should shoot straight from the lip. Hey, there’ll be plenty of time for tongue twisting at the end of the night — keep him in anticipation of what’s to come as you pull away. Read the rest.

Ever wonder how that sweet man or woman could have ever said such hurtful things just a moment ago? One minute, you are whispering sweet words of affection, smiling, everything is wonderful - amazing even…. A few moments later, something is said or done and the next thing you know, you and your partner are screaming and berating each other, By the time either of you figure out that this wasn’t your intention - it’s too late.

“Many of us take a fight-or-flight approach to conflict, sometimes only to make our point stick. You and your future partner are on the same side of the same team, which is difficult to remember when you are in a heated argument” says Nancy Pina, author of How To Create Relationship Success.

You must approach sensitive issues with sensitivity. You must approach each other with love and never forget what’s important - You love each other.
Pina says, “Each has the responsibility to resolve issues around emotional buttons.”

Read the rest.

Ps. The faster you get past the conflict, the sooner you get to the hot make-up sex.

Wondering how to restart the sparks in your relationship? This video outlines a new therapist-created method. Enjoy!

Planning a get-away to a hot destination these cold seasons? As if thawing your bones wasn’t enough incentive, SheKnows gives you some passionate reasons to escape to the islands with your man.

A private getaway without the kids

Spontaneous, incredible, passionate sex. You remember that, don’t you? If your memory is a little foggy from working too hard or taking care of the kids, maybe it’s time for a sensual vacation.Where you go on vacation isn’t as important as choosing an atmosphere that puts you and your partner in the mood for love. Some may find it seductive to strip off their clothes and mingle at a nude beach, while others crave the intimacy of a cabin hideaway where they can skinny dip in a nearby stream and make love in a bed of wildflowers. Still others may find that a bottle of champagne and the comforts of a luxury hotel put them in the mindset for a steamy encounter.

“I believe that sensual vacations can happen anywhere,” says Leslie Karsner, founder of RomanceInstitute.com and author of The Long Distance Romance Guide (see Resources section below). “The key is to be in a place where you truly spend time together connecting.”

Karsner says that participating in athletic activities, such as scuba diving or skiing, helps to get the adrenaline flowing, which, she says, “makes for great sexual encounters.”

“Go dancing,” she continues. “Try something new together…or one of you can teach the other something in which you’re the pro. In any case, be sure to include laughter.”

Be daring

“Creating adventure in your sex life keeps it alive,” says Karsner. She says that to experience a sensual vacation you should be willing to “be racy, be silly, be risky.”

“Think of the things that used to be such incredible turn-ons and infuse them back into your current sex life,” Karsner advises. She says that she often counsels couples to make love in a place where they’ve never made love before in order to create a more sensual experience.

One couple followed her advice by making love in the workout room of a high-rise hotel. “The lights were dim and were shining off the silver weight machines. There was steam rising from the hot tub and right there in an enclave they made love. It was further intensified by their reflection in the mirror. My clients were thrilled with their risky ways and giggled all the way up in the elevator,” says Karsner. Read the rest.

 When your man is deployed, here are a few tip to deploy passion when you’re far away:

Since men are visual creatures, spice up your web cam life with a striptease, a lingerie fashion show, or some naughty fun with toys.

He needs to be able to count the days until he comes home to you, right? Why not make a calendar with a sexy image of you every month.

Write him (or photocopy him) erotic tales that explore a theme he and/or you are interested in.

Try and use all his senses. Send him a pair of your panties and a polaroid of you wearing them.  Record a sexy message and send it on CD…or read one of those stories to him as a sweet and sultry good night tale.

One of She Knows’ media partners, Cosmopolitan wrote the perfect article on keeping the romance alive…especially when you hit that year, year and a half routine. These 23 tips will make sure you get butterflies again!

1. Share a Secret Code

Pick a word that’s likely to come up occasionally in conversation (heat, midnight, bedroom, whipped cream…) and agree that every time someone uses it, you have to touch — anything from a kiss to a lingering thigh stroke under the table.

2. Transform Dinner into Dining

That midweek post-grind meal you devour together? Make it register off the mush-o-meter with some tiny adjustments to the atmosphere. “Pull out your nicest dishes and light a couple of candles, even if you’re just having a mushroom pizza,” suggests Gregory Godek, author of 1001 Ways to Be Romantic (Casablanca Press, 2000). “It’s the mood, not the food, that sets a romantic scene. So stick a bouquet of daisies from the corner store in the center of the table, lower the lights, and turn up Enrique Iglesias or Bessie Smith. You could even conveniently forget the utensils so you have an excuse to feed each other.”

3. Get Swept Off Your Feet

Make up your own tango moves and groove with your guy for 15 minutes while you wait for dinner. Pop in the Marc Anthony CD, then press your pelvises together, entwine your legs, and twist and twirl around the living room. “Slow dancing is so intimate,” says Godek. “The way you stand hip-to-hip, block out the world, and sway to each other’s rhythms … now you’re really cookin’.”

Read the rest.