Swing On By!

Dear departed Jane magazine (the stepsister you are happy is your stepsister, but you really just want former editor-in-chief Jane Pratt’s Sassy back) ran an (okay) article on swingers not of the ilk of “suburban car key swappers.” Well, they could have been, but they were at least at very, very good looking. It’s good to see a fly-on-the-wall report on the scene, which holds so many delights, well, for the people who like to swing. Read on. Sexxxplorer

Brekke Fletcher goes to a sex club where everyone isn’t pale and old.

The word swinger makes me think of the ’70s Playboy letters, but when a friend tells me about One Leg Up (onelegupnyc.com) - supposedly not your mama’s sex party - I agree to go. And not just because I want to check “multiple partner sextravaganza” off my list of Things To Do Before I Die (Next up: Everest!). The first good sign: The screening process requires an essay and photos, which decreases the odds of being drooled on by some illiterate, thong-sporting Ron Jeremy-type. I enlist Todd, a guy I’ve been fooling around with, as my escort. Arriving at a nondescript building in midtown New York, we find a dimly lit, S&M-ready apartment with 15 raring-to-go men and women in erotic garb milling about and sucking down cocktails. We keep our clothes on - for the time being - and chat up two attractive couples who have either enviable metabolisms or personal trainers. We talk about why we’re all here (experimentation, curiosity, variety), and later strip down to our undies. I try to get into the action by licking the arm of a wigged woman as her partner gropes my ass, but alas, I feel no tingles. Then I notice two more gorgeous couples having zesty intercourse nearby - clearly they don’t seem to be having any problem. Damn my vagina.

To find a sex club near you - and pics of people you might see there - go to swingersclublist.com